this whole "getting ready to leave" thing is really hard. on one side i'm trying to buy all the camping gear I need, read up on local events, and read the recent books on african politics, and on the other side I'm attempting to be normal, go to lunch, have happy hours, work, meet new people and be in the moment. I'm having a really tough time balancing it. In DC, which i love and miss dearly, I had a very socially vibrant lifestyle where I was at all the hot restaurants, bars, movies, shopping and going out frequently. I lived it, I worked it, I miss it. Here in Seattle, I work in retail when the January labor budget allows, I go out when one of my few friends here is available, but it's all a lot more anticlimactic than it used to be. With everyone I meet I feel like I should add the caveat "but don't get too attached to me, because I'm moving to Africa in 6 weeks, as long as everything goes as planned." It's very difficult to live with the same abandon and spontaneity as I would normally with this constantly in the back of my head. Should I stay in my house and prepare for the journey? or should I live out my life here as I would normally so that I get the most out my last 6 weeks?
I have no idea. and I don't think I'll resolve these two sides of me before I leave. There is always something to prepare for, something to look forward to, something to miss. We just have to live in the moment and hope that the past or the future don't dominate too heavily so as the destroy the current.
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