small talk

sometimes I get really annoyed when I have to explaining this adventure to people. I was at the dentist today, and I've been going there since I was really little, so they've known me forever and they started asking a lot about the Peace Corps. (they did all the x-rays, so i knew this was coming) Now small talk at the dentist is never easy - it's tough to make a complicated point when there are sharp metals things in your mouth - but I think it's even more difficult when I'm trying to explain my completely foreign job. It's hard to explain something I haven't started yet, something that I don't fully understand, something that I have thousands of different emotions about. It's also annoying when people ask questions, but in a really ignorant way like "well at least you won't have to spend much money there, cuz what would you spend it on?!" and i just want to go into a total tirade about how actually there are lots of wonderful tourist destinations and beautiful things to spend money on. But then I think that it's probably not even worth it to try and summarize all the many things I've read in less than a minute in between rinses. I wish people were more educated about the diversity of Africa, but I can't be the person who changes every opinion. First of all, I'm not qualified (who really is?), and second of all, I wish people wanted to learn these things by themselves. Although I can't expect everyone to be as curious about Africa as I am, after all, I don't know very much about the vast area of the former USSR, or South America or Physics or Cars, to name a few things.

In other news, I've started laying out my clothes, I've got basically everything I need, things are coming together. Also, I'm reading "The World Without Us" by Alan Weisman which I have wanted to read since it came out a few months ago. It's SO interesting. I'm learning a lot about modern engineering, material properties, climate history and geography. It also includes a pretty hefty amount of archaeology, which I've always loved, and it's neat to see applied archaeology used in this way. Weisman interviewed so many different types of experts that it's turning out to be a very balanced and complete analysis. I heartily recommend it.

Some Things are Awesome

I just installed my new ipod, which is amazing. Now i just need tons of new music to put on it, so that I have an endless supply of new tunes as well as music for every occasion! My philosophy is that you just never know when you'll need a trio of say Aqua "Barbie Girl", Pink Floyd "Dark Side of the Moon", and NWA. It could happen. Anyways, I'm also thinking of what tv shows and other things I might like to have on there. I have the office season 2, which is wonderful, but I really wish i could have all my movies. I remember when I was in Cape Town and I neglected to bring any movies. I was forced to rewatch over and over the same 10 movies that I didn't even like for 5 months. Needless to say, I watched How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days with commentary more than once.

I love television. Currently I'm watching School of Rock, which I happen to love. And today, after I returned from my trip to the farmer's market with mom (armed with delicious cheese), we sat down to watch some football. I will really miss being able to yell at sporting events thus terrifying my dogs. Hopefully my village enjoys soccer.

I think at one point a lot of my friends and family were really excited for me, but now that i'm leaving in 30 days, the reality is setting in. Sorry to friends and family who are reading this - I will miss you too. But it's a really exciting adventure, and who knows where it will lead my life! I mean, I have a general plan for what I want to do after Peace Corps, but it could always change...one never knows what will happen.

One of my good friends, a fellow ADPi pc'03 with me, Danielle, was/is a pc volunteer in Kenya. The last I read was that she was being sent back to the US after a couple weeks in Tanzania. I am so sad for her since she's only been posted for 6 months and I know she was getting really excited about her work. I hope that things in Kenya stabilize sooner rather than later so that the volunteers there can continue to work. Danielle, if you read this: I miss you and wish you well!

wrapping my mind around it

this whole "getting ready to leave" thing is really hard. on one side i'm trying to buy all the camping gear I need, read up on local events, and read the recent books on african politics, and on the other side I'm attempting to be normal, go to lunch, have happy hours, work, meet new people and be in the moment. I'm having a really tough time balancing it. In DC, which i love and miss dearly, I had a very socially vibrant lifestyle where I was at all the hot restaurants, bars, movies, shopping and going out frequently. I lived it, I worked it, I miss it. Here in Seattle, I work in retail when the January labor budget allows, I go out when one of my few friends here is available, but it's all a lot more anticlimactic than it used to be. With everyone I meet I feel like I should add the caveat "but don't get too attached to me, because I'm moving to Africa in 6 weeks, as long as everything goes as planned." It's very difficult to live with the same abandon and spontaneity as I would normally with this constantly in the back of my head. Should I stay in my house and prepare for the journey? or should I live out my life here as I would normally so that I get the most out my last 6 weeks?

I have no idea. and I don't think I'll resolve these two sides of me before I leave. There is always something to prepare for, something to look forward to, something to miss. We just have to live in the moment and hope that the past or the future don't dominate too heavily so as the destroy the current.

New Blog!

soooo, time to start the blog up again. first, i will explain my title, even though writers don't have to do that. I sometimes call hippies, or people who wear hemp and march for guatemalan goat rights and things of that sort "granolas" as in they are crunchy, like their hair. This is not a cruel, hateful judgement, merely a creative description. It's also a description that I don't really fit, despite the sheltered beliefs of some of my east coast friends. Girls, just because I don't wear pearls, does not mean I am granola. And yet, now I find myself with a pair of hemp underwear (with peace signs on them no less!), learning how to use a leatherman tool (whatever, it's purple), and buying dehydrated foods. My how things change! But I do plan on bringing my mascara with me to the Zambian bush. No i won't wear it everyday, but it's like a security blanket of sorts, and i'm not ashamed.

Once I get to Zambia I won't be able to post very often, we're talking monthly if i'm lucky, but since I will likely have lots of free, alone time to write, hopefully they will be good enough to make up for the infrequency. Life is about quality, not quantity. But when I'm not writing, I will be trying to do some health education. I'm gonna put all those public health classes to good use, learn a new language and bike my little legs off. and I'm definately looking forward to it.

*the picture in the title bar is actually in botswana, in the okavango delta. It's an acacia tree at dusk. i took it in april 2006.